dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Randomize
