thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
he quoted the bible to break up with me
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
