i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
