I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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