Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
