I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
