i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
