You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
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