i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
My pussy is not your playground.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Randomize
