do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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