"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
