I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
