Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
