Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
