Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
