Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
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