Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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