North Korea, Best Korea!
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
