i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
