Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
