New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
