I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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