Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
