what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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