no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
