Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize