Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I touched a dick in church today
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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