U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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