Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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