Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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