Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
