Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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