im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
