I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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