using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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