i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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