Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
