Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
