He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Randomize
