Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize