it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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