So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
we made out on top of his cat.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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