And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
