My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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