i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
