just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
