hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
