508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
