When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
