I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
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