That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i barfeds in our rink
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
